I dance a few different dance forms where you dance with both men and women. I had a month last year where I remarked to a friend of mine that all of my best dances had been with men. Many of these came when I was in the lead role and they the follow. The dances with men were better Read More …
Sometimes I struggle with jealousy. Not jealousy of a lover but jealousy over the successes of others. Sometimes I feel so small that when I look at someone else getting an awesome accolade for their achievements I say “Why not me? Why was I not noticed? Why have I not done enough to get noticed?”. When someone excels at what Read More …
At a party not long ago I was asked “If you were a super-hero based on the greatest strength you have now, what super hero would you be?” The power that I feel has been my greatest asset is resiliency. I’m really good at getting up after I get knocked down. In fact I so rarely feel like I fail Read More …
One of the biggest barriers to changing one’s behaviour is the feeling that the new behaviour “isn’t you”. Well the truth is that *it’s not*. At least not yet. If you want to get different results you’re going to need to try different strategies and like learning any new skill these new behaviours are going to feel uncomfortable and wooden Read More …
How much pain does it take before you’re ready to change? When a particular course of action isn’t working, it’s always amazing to me how long we as humans can tolerate it. The pain of change is often felt to be significantly higher than the pain of the current course. And at least the current pain is a known pain, Read More …
Everyone knows if you want to get better at something you have to practice. However making time in a busy schedule can be super-challenging. It’s easy to have the intention to practice but then not actually get around to it. The next thing you know you’re back at your swordplay/dance/yoga class and you haven’t done anything you’d hoped to since Read More …
I remember when I was married, one of our biggest philosophical challenges was a belief and desire on the part of my wife to make our relationship and our family the centre of our lives. This never functioned for me and in spite all of our love for one another it eventually took us away from each other. I have Read More …
(Warning, this is a very sword fighting training oriented post) So myself and a group of my senior students at Academie Duello are preparing for a rapier fencing tournament at the end of January hosted by the Society for Creative Anachronism called Ursulmas. This event typically attracts between 45 and 60 participants in the tournament including high quality competitors and Read More …
I like to say that I come by my confidence honestly. I have never been meek but I have had a lot of challenges of self worth to work through. Every area where I stand strong now I’ve had to come through from a place of weakness. I have had a lot of luck on my side. I’m a tall, Read More …
Being grown up is not about having a serious and conservative view of the world. Nor is it about giving up being a child. Maturity is knowing when to be a child. When a co-worker gets on your nerves – this is the time to be an adult, express how you feel and seek resolution. When someone taunts you affectionately Read More …